I hear all sorts of guilt that parents unnecessarily carry around with them every day. The sad thing is that the guilt that you feel, holds you back from making the progress that you deserve and living the lifestyle that is healthier for you and child.
Some of the common types of reasons for guilt that I hear are:
- Something during pregnancy
- Snapping at child and loosing patience
- Wanting me time
- Having respite
- Not spending time with siblings
- Not spending time with partner
- Not spending time with child
- Having a cleaner
- Not doing enough
- Cant help the way you feel about someone or something
The list goes on, and whatever it is mostly does not serve you to be and do the best that you can.
The main reason that it is not healthy to feel guilty is that it wastes a huge amount of your time and energy thinking about it when you could be using that time more effectively. Not to mention that all that negative energy and thought can and will ultimately affect your health.
If you don’t like something change it. If you cant change it, change your attitude. Don’t complain! Maya Angelou
“But… I can’t help the way I feel!” Here’s the thing…you CAN! You are in charge of your feelings and you can decide on the way you fee. OK so here’s what we can do about it to release some of these feelings to help you move on more productively…
1. Identify and acknowledge the feeling
2. Understand why you feel that way
3. Give yourself a break… love and accept you for who you are
4. Choose a better feeling thought
5. Take action to head towards that feeling
6. Accept that it’s a work in progress
7. Surround yourself with others that can support you
8. Stop talking negatively about it
9. Respect yourself - treat yourself
10. Make the realisation that in order to be the best and most productive you – you deserve this.
This is an area that is covered in step 2 of the CORE Steps process. If you would like some support on using tools to address mindset issues related to parenting and autism, please contact me to discuss the support I can offer you at email@example.com